True Love
by LuckyStarPham
Summary: "True love isn't about always being together. It's about loving each other even more each day no matter how much time you spend apart."
1. Chapter 1

_Hello._

_This is my third attempt at writing a McRoll fiction. I've kept it in my computer for so long and I never have the courage to post it until now. _

_Just wanna shout out a special THANK YOU to all of my favorite McRollers. I appreciate the friendships I've striken up with all of you :) _

_And another THANK YOU goes to the my big sister - Paula. Thank you for helping me out by being my beloved beta reader. I will never dare to post it without your help. _

_Sorry for rambling!_

_Thanks for reading and hope you will enjoy the story! I'd really appreciate if you guys could take time leaving a comment._

_Disclaimer: All rights reserved for CBS and the managing team of Hawaii 5-0._

* * *

**True love**

**Chapter 1:**

**Hawaii..**

It had been around a week since the last time Catherine called. When she ended the last call, Steve expected to hear from her again two days later. But it had been seven days. The last thing he received from her was a message saying "I love you".

Simple as that.

That was truly the longest week Steve's ever experienced in his life. He couldn't help thinking about every potential possibility. The fact that his mind was full of Catherine didn't do him any good. Quite the contrary, it made him suffer two shotgun wounds within a week, one in his arm and the other in his stomach. Luckily they were not really serious. Even the very calm-in-every-situation Chin scold him off for being careless at work.

For the first time in his career, he just couldn't focus. Physically, he was in Hawaii but his heart was someplace else. It flew to another part of the world.

A place very far away from Hawaii.

Steve ignored all the rants and raves from Danny, he just didn't want to listen to anymore of his bullshit. He just wanted to be home. Waiting for her calls. He even refused to stay at the hospital after he was shot. After all, Catherine was all alone out there. She had to take care of herself. That thought hurt him more than any shotgun wound. He tried several calls during the last three days, but all he heard at the other end of the line was cold static. Every night he woke up from a nightmare that he could never accept: Catherine is not coming back.

Another day went by.

Another week went by.

He couldn't wait any longer.

Steve started trying to get a hold of Joe White, so that he could go to Afghanistan under the radar without getting any trouble. The fact was that he would do anything to bring Catherine back, even if the consequence could be him ending up in jail for the rest of his life. It didn't matter, and truthfully, he didn't give a damn.

He just wanted her to be alive.

Whenever he's injured, he didn't want Catherine to be around, because he couldn't stand the pain in her eyes. But this time, he wanted her company, wanted her to sit right here, next to him, changing his bandage for him. Here he was, struggling to change a new bandage himself. It was something very familiar, he has done this for hundreds of times, no, thousands of times. But today everything suddenly seemed so difficult. It took him a little longer than normal to finish that task.

It's raining outside. Steve was sitting under his lanai and kept thinking about the legendary story about the rain he told Catherine last time. "_The tears of separated and reunited couple_". He wished Catherine could be here, and they could enjoy each other's company and share this view. As he sat down, he could hear the sound of the droplets of the rain splattering against the window. His thoughts wandered back to Afghanistan and wondered to himself what Catherine was doing right now, how her mission was going.

He missed her. There wasn't a single moment where he didn't miss her, but he missed her the most at night.

He felt lonely... and vulnerable.

Suddenly, his phone rang. Unlike the other two previous times, Steve picked up his cell phone almost immediately.

"Steve."

"Thank God, Catherine. How are you?", Catherine could easily pick up the relief coming from Steve's voice. She couldn't help herself from cracking a soft laugh.

"Yeah it's me. Sorry for not calling any sooner."

"You called back. That's good. That's good. That's all that matters. When will you come back to Hawaii? I'll pick you up."

"Steve. Listen to me. I can't come back now... Because I..."

The realization of what she was saying hit him hard. His heart was shattered into a million pieces within seconds. The immense relief suddenly turned into a huge disappointment. It was like him falling from heaven to earth. "Cath, what are you talking about?", his voice started cracking: "What do you mean you can't come back?", he was totally frozen. He couldn't concentrate, he couldn't even breathe. The imagine of his recent terrifying nightmare turned his mind blank. He totally lost his control, he couldn't listen to what she was going to say. Everything was just a blur.

"..."

"Steve, are you listening? Steve? Steve? I know it's kind of embarrassing, but I have no other choice."

"Catherine", Steve's voice calling her name was the most devastating sound she has ever heard over the years. She immediately realized what she's just done to him. She regretted her choice of words and secretly cursed herself for being so stupid.

"Do you hear what I've just said?"

"Catherine, why...?" His voice was full of raw pain and it was killing her. "Are you hurt? How's your mission? Is Najib alive?"

She elaborated quickly: "It just... I don't have enough cash to buy tickets to come back. I spent a small fortune over last year and I didn't bring that much cash. Things are a little rough lately, but everything's fine, Steve. Najib is safe, mission is completed. I just don't have any money left. That was what I was trying to say earlier, but you already seem to lose your focus. Can you...?". It was a bit awkward to ask Steve to send her money, but Catherine didn't have any other choice.

"Rollins, you did that on purpose, didn't you?"

"I'm sorry, Steve. Coming home is all I can think about and I admit I didn't think clearly... That shouldn't be the first thing I told you. I didn't mean to tease you or freak you out. I would never do that to you. That would be such a cruel joke. Though I'm sincerely sorry."

"You've just killed me, Rollins. Of course I will send you money. Do you want me to fly over there to pick you up?", his voice returned to its teasing tone and his whole facial expressions loosened, as well.

"Very funny. I'm a big girl and I don't need to be picked up. Yet I would appreciate if you could be there when I land in Hawaii."

"Of course. There's no way I won't be there. I'm transferring money to your account as we speak."

"It's officially over, right?"

"It is"

"Still, be careful, Cath! Coming home is a long journey."

"I will."

"It seems that my "Good luck!" wish works, doesn't it?" Even though they would be together very soon, Steve didn't want to end this phone call so soon.

Thinking back about her mission, which Catherine didn't want to tell Steve over the phone, she smiled softly: "Yes, yes it works. Thank you, Steve, again!"

"I don't accept just words. You need to prove your point by actions, you know?", Steve's voice was so much happier and relaxing after hearing her soft laugh.

The fact that Catherine could visualize clearly his goofy face lightened up her own face.

"I will."

"And Cath... it's raining again tonight. I don't want to believe much in those legendary stories, but... you know... "**The tears of separated and reunited couple**". Such a coincidence!"

"Yeah it is. I can't wait to come back!"

* * *

**Honolulu International Airport**

Steve was waiting impatiently at the airport. Even before her call, Steve went to the airport every day, although he already put an alert on her, so the airport will let him know when Catherine lands. He kept telling himself that's a part of his job: criminals showed up in the airport, trying to escape from the island in almost every case. But deep down inside, Steve knew it's just an excuse. He wanted to be at the airport to make sure he would be there for Cath if she arrived. Any time.

This time, he purchased the ticket for her from Afghanistan to Hawaii himself - the fastest flight he could arrange. He knew exactly the time and date. And right now, here he was - right here in the middle of the airport.

Finally.

Catherine was coming home today.

To be honest, he was new to this experience. He rarely was the one who waited at the airport. It was always the other way around, especially when it comes to him and Catherine. He only picked Mary up from Honolulu International Airport twice before, and neither of those occasions brought him this much nervousness and happiness. Steve felt like his whole life was nearly reborn. From this moment on, he won't have to deal with lonely nights or face scary nightmare demons. More importantly, he won't feel that helpless from hearing her exhausted voice through the damn phone line, which always made him want to choke.

He nervously walked back and forth in front of the gate he knew she would show up. He couldn't sit still, he had to pace restlessly up and down, he needed to do something to clear his mind from the beautiful scenarios he's building inside his head.

Among the crowd, Steve froze at the sight before his eyes. The most beautiful sight he has ever seen over the past year. The most beautiful, attractive, sexiest woman he has ever seen in his life. She looked incredibly amazing, even with several fading bruises on her face. The dark circles under her eyes betrayed her sleeplessness, but it didn't make her less beautiful than he remembered.

She still looked tired though. After all, that was a really long fight.

Steve could hear his heartbeat thumping so loud, so eagerly and happily. That special feeling when she was around has never changed. Not only his mind, his heart reacted, so did his body. She was standing there, smiling at him with the most gorgeous and sparkling smile ever. Seeing her... even in a distance... made him forget how to move, how to breathe properly.

They stared at each other for several minutes, like they totally forgot how to function. Finally, Steve was the one who reacted first, because it seemed that Catherine was too weak to move. Not physically, but emotionally. The only thing she could do was smile at him. He run through the chaotic crowded people in the airport and made his way to the woman he loved more than anything. Yes, he has always loved her, and he wasn't afraid to say it out loud anymore. She was opening her arms widely, waiting for him with tears already secretly making their way over her face.

He hugged her, desperately leaning into her as if he would never let her go. Danny told him Catherine was the best thing ever happened to him, and it was true. He didn't dare to loosen the hug. Because in his dreams, whenever he pulled back and was about to kiss her, Catherine vanished into thin air, or someone shoot her from behind. He couldn't let that happen in real life. Steve automatically swayed and changed their positions. It was an awkward move, but he just wanted to make sure no one could harm her from behind. His left hand went to the back of her head, pulling her even closer, almost crushing her, but he needed it. His right hand caressed her trembling back. This felt real, like the day he found her in the jungle. He came so close to lose her, twice. But now... she's back. He buried his face into her hair, her neck, trying so hard to control his emotional state, trying to convince himself this wasn't a dream. Tears were already in his eyes when he realized she was reacting and caressing his stiff back.

Her familiar scent penetrated him. The realization hit him.

She is real.

For the next several long minutes, neither of them moved. They continued to hug and simply enjoyed each other's presence. There wasn't any space between them, not even a millimeter. Catherine felt like she lost the ability to talk. Finally, Steve leaned back, quietly wiping the tears from his eyes. He then smiled at her and wiped her tears that she didn't even realize she had.

"Is it real, Catherine?", Steve murmured into her ears. This scenario has happened tons of times in his best dreams, but they just made him miss her even more when he woke up. Now, feeling the shaky warm body in his arms, for the first time in a very long time, Steve could tell it wasn't a dream. He kissed Catherine's hair and wasn't willing to let her go.

"Yes", Catherine nodded. Ater chocking out that only word response, she buried her head into his chess again, longing for his familiar smell - her favorite smell, then pressed it further into his neck, seeking his closeness. Suddenly Steve didn't know what else he should say at that moment, so he decided to let the silence rule the moment. He tighten his hug, which almost made Catherine suffocate, but she didn't mind, both of them just savored the moment. They both felt each other shaking desperately, and their heart were beating so loudly under the fabric of clothes.

They hung on to each other for dear life.

"If this is just a dream, please let it last for... forever...", Catherine whispered in tears, almost like talking to herself, even though she just told him it was real. Sometimes she couldn't distinguish real life from a dream, because this feeling was too good to be true.

"Catherine," his voice cracked as he whispered her name.

"Catherine", he has whispered her name for thousands of times in his life. Just pronouncing her name again and again inside his head already made everything better, like the way Chicago comforted her. And this therapy has always worked for him, effectively.

Hearing her own name from Steve's lips made Catherine feel incredibly special. That endearing sound always made Catherine's heart clench in an indescribable way. It made her feel safe and appreciated. No one has ever said her name the way Steve does. She has heard her name said by many people in her life, but only Steve could make it sound like the most soothing and touching sound ever. Every time she heard it, she believed she meant something to him, she believed he had feelings for her, even though he hadn't declared that. Her eyes become damp again. Deep down inside, somewhere in her heart, there was a special feeling that she couldn't explain and she thought she'd never feel it again.

"Steve, I've missed you so damn much. I miss you, you know..."

"I'm glad you do", he smiled, trying to let out a joke, and went back to the serious tone: "It goes both ways."

With that, he finally bent down to place a gentle kiss into her lips. The kiss tasted salty yet sweet. That was the most heart-wrenching kiss as he could remember. The feeling of Catherine kissing him and him kissing her always affected him greatly... but this time, it felt different.

It was the first kiss they shared after exchanging those three words.

It felt... official.

Like a whole new chapter of their relationship.

"Cath", he called her name, looking into her eyes, his hand slipping into her hair, "I love you."

"I love you. I've never stopped loving you, Sailor." Tears continued streaming down her beautiful face. She felt like she wasn't really like herself today because she already wasted more tears than the tears she wasted in her whole life.

* * *

**Outside Honolulu Airport**

After tossing her bag into his truck, Steve stopped besides his truck and pulled Catherine in for another hug. He leant into her, didn't want to let her go because it still felt overwhelming. He just had to make sure she's real.

Catherine hugged Steve with all strength left in her. Her whole body was more than exhausted. But she smiled softly when she heard a soft voice besides her ears - the familiar voice that she missed so much - the same voice that gave her courage and brave to never stop fighting in Afghanistan, especially in the toughest situations: "I'm sorry. I just need a moment."

She didn't mind. She needed that too.

"You're so thin, you know that... How long has it been since the very last time you ate a proper dinner? Come on, let's get you home. I'll wine and dine you."

"That's good to hear. Thank you, Steve. I've dreamt about sushi and your steak during my flight."

* * *

**McGarrett/Rollins residence.**

While watching her stuffing his homemade steak into her mouth, Steve blurted out: "You know what, I can easily accuse you of stealing."

"What?"

"You stole my shirt."

"You mean... **my** favorite blue shirt... Yeah... Sorry." - she didn't even try to be embarrassed. "It has always made me sleep better. Because it has your smell on it. Anyway, I bought you a new shirt before I took that shirt with me."

"But you haven't worn it yet, so... that new shirt is not my favorite shirt."

Hearing the honesty in his voice tugs at Catherine's heart-strings. She looked down at her steak, trying to keep calm and take control over her shaky hands.

"And you stole my heart."

"Wow. This accusation is sooo harsh! Could you be more corny?" Even she was using her teasing tone, his accusation actually sent a shiver down her spine. Warmth was spreading inside her body and touched her heart. Catherine couldn't hide a small smile tugging at the corner of her lips.

Steve tried to pretend it was just a joke. But deep down inside, both of them knew it was from the bottom of his heart.

"So, how is the steak?", Despite oher smile, Steve saw a brief sign of hesitation in Catherine's eyes, so he changed the subject. Honestly, he didn't know where their relationship stood after months of separation. How he felt didn't change, but he wasn't sure about Catherine. The hesitation in her eyes was killing him. Kissing was still amazing, but her body became rigid whenever he touched her. Steve wasn't sure if Catherine realized that herself.

"It's out of this world. Thank you."

"How are you feeling?", Steve put the dishes away, moved closer to Catherine, held her tightly.

"Feeling safe... with you... It's always like that. I love you, you know...". It was not easy for her to say these three words out loud, but since that phone call, everything was much easier. Saying "I love you" now actually was like the most natural thing to do. And she really enjoyed it.

"I love you too. I'm sorry I didn't say it enough. I'm sorry I didn't... Doing it over the phone is the most stupid thing ever..."

"Trust me, it's not. At least you said it. And to be fair, I hadn't said that either."

"Yeah, fair enough."

With that, Steve led her to their bedroom.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own any rights to the TV series, _Hawaii Five-0_.

**Chap 2:**

* * *

**McGarrett/ Rollins's bedroom**

"Why don't you... you know... This?", she pointed at her body and their bed, "I thought our first night would be...", Catherine asked as Steve was sitting next to her, their backs were backing at the headboard. They had been in Steve's bed for an hour and he hadn't even tried to remove any of her clothes. That was not common for them, especially after months of separation. She couldn't help but wondering where their relationship stood.

No matter how hard she tried, her eyes were full of surprise, disappointment and... relief.

"Listen.. Don't be ridiculous. I know what you're thinking, but that's not it, okay? Nothing's gonna change between us. It's just... I don't want you to think the first thing I want after getting you back is sex. Our relationship is much more than that. I want you to have the feeling of being home. Everything else... we could deal with it later."

"Wow, Steve, thank you". She didn't know what to say after hearing such a delicate thought of him. She hadn't even thought about it. She felt so lucky to have a thoughtful man like Steve in her life.

"Besides, you don't realize that, do you?", Steve took her right hand, squeezing it.

"Realize what?", she asked him, feeling a bit confused.

"Your body becomes extremely tense whenever I touch you. I don't think you'd ever done that before. Maybe you don't realize it yourself, but I do. I assume something happened in Afghanistan. I know it's not easy to live in Afghanistan... I went there myself. And I saw things there. One of the most terrible sights that I can't forget was the face of those raped women. I know, it's not easy to walk away when you encounter something like that... And I understand, totally understand that we can't always be the hero, we can't save everyone that is in trouble. We have another - more important - mission at hand. I just don't want to add more pressure on you. I'm not saying this has anything to do with our relationship, but I assume having sex is not the most appropriate thing you have in mind. I'm just saying... I can give you time to forget... When you are comfortable enough to have sex, let me know, then we'll get there. Catherine, I just want you to be happy, to feel safe. I don't want to rush you into anything or force you to do something that you are not comfortable with, you know... I can wait. My boy isn't really patient, but I'll try my best."

Catherine didn't realize tears were forming in her eyes until she felt Steve's hand wiping them away. She looked down and again, lost her ability to talk. Steve used his fingers to lift her face up and gave her a soft kiss on her forehead, right in her fading bruise.

After a while, she finally uttered: "Steve, you're amazing. I'm amazed. How could you read my mind like that?"

"You read my mind better than me, too. You were like that when I was a SEAL, remember? Exactly where we are right now, just the other way around. I was always astonished how you could read my mind and know exactly what I needed to hear, know exactly what to say to make me feel better. It feels like my mind is naked in front of you all the time, you know. When I realized that for the first time, I tried to push you away, because I was scared. Nobody had ever read me like you do... it's kinda terrifying at first", he chuckled a bit, then looked at her seriously, "It's love, Catherine. It's because you care about me. It's because I care about you."

"Steve, thank you.", Catherine touched and caressed his cheek.

"Come here", he pulled her closer, let her rest her head into his shoulder. His left arm pulled her into a hug. Hugging was really comforting for both of them at this moment.

"Talk to me. If you need anything, I'm here. You are not gonna do this alone. Don't keep it to yourself, because it's really painful. I know that feeling. Trust me, Cath. We are both in Navy, I'm 4 years older than you. Everything you went through, I went through several years ago. Let me be your guide. Let me share your burden with you. Talk, Cath."

"Okay. You're probably right. It's always good to have someone to talk to. I almost forget how it feels to share things. Over the last year, I accidentally run into several women while they were being raped. I couldn't forget how terrified their eyes were. They were begging for help, Steve, anybody's help. I saw them from the bush, and damn it, I had to lay low, to keep myself under the radar. My job there was to get Najib rescued. I walked away so many times. And I dreamt about them every night. I wish I could do something differently so that I could save them. They were so young, so innocent, Steve."

She could feel his arm around her tighter a bit. His close intimacy really encouraged her to let everything out.

"The day after I called you... I said I conducted a detailed plan with a fine-tooth comb. But the mission didn't go to my plan. There's one thing I didn't expect. That day, they kidnapped a 12-year-old girl to their tent, along with Najib. Those assholes weren't human, Steve. She was just 12 years old, a bit older than Grace. They killed her whole family before taking her there. I heard them plan to rape her before putting her into an intense training program to become a sniper. Losing her family, losing her virginity, so basically she didn't have anything else to lose, she would have to obey them eventually. I couldn't take it anymore. For a moment, I thought I could rescue both of them. After I made contact with Najib and told him my plan, I managed to come closer to the little girl. Maybe I wasn't careful enough, or I wasn't meant to help her. They knew about my presence, they took me, and killed that little girl right before my eyes, "to teach me a lesson", she quoted. "Steve, I couldn't forget her innocent eyes. She's just a baby. If I had thought more carefully, maybe she wouldn't have been killed. It's my fault, Steve." ...

"No. Catherine. Don't blame yourself. I know it's hard, but it's not your fault. We aren't superhero, you know that..." Steve tried his best to encourage Catherine, but he knew it was not easy to forget something like that. Sometimes that kind of event haunted people for the rest of their lives. He wished he could take all the pain and obsession away from Catherine, or at least he'd rather be the one who endured that pain instead of watching her blame herself while he couldn't do anything. Steve remembered exactly how pain Catherine was when she lost Billy over a mission. He didn't want to see her going through that feeling ever again.

"They captured me. Luckily because of that, Najib took a chance to run away himself. I told him to try to be as quiet as possible and run as fast as he could, straight to a place I already secured. They probably were too busy with me to pay attention to Najib."

"What? You got yourself captured? Then how...?", Steve's concerned voice immediately raised. Worry was clearly written in his face as creases appeared in his forehead. He immediately thought back when he was captured himself. The amount of beating he had to endure still sent a shiver down his spine. The thought of Catherine experiencing the same thing tore him inside.

"They've beaten me pretty badly. But everything's fine, Steve." Catherine tried her best to keep the whole situation sound not-so-serious. "I'm here now, right in your arms, that's all that matters."

That didn't ease the pain in Steve's face, though his body was less tense than before. Steve's heart ached at any possibility of Catherine being beaten. He instantly took her hands and entwined their fingers together. That movement calmed both of them. Her closeness reminded him of how real she was. Whatever happened, happened. The good thing was that she was safe now.

Steve leaned further to peck at Catherine's cheek, stealing away the tears running down her cheek.

"I didn't cry in almost one year or so. I thought I forgot how to cry... It feels... strange yet normal to cry again... When I was in Afghanistan, I only cried after we talked over the sat phone."

"So I made you cry huh?", Steve looked at her apologetic.

"It's not your fault. Actually it's great to feel like a human. Steve, have I told you I miss you so much?", she cupped his face, staring at him, taking in the sight of him looking so content.

"I've missed you, too", he kissed the soft palm of her hand, guiding her hand touching over his face.

They repositioned their position, so that both of them felt more comfortable. It was a little bit cold outside, so Steve pulled the thin blanket up, covering Cath's body. The thought of her lying on his bed, and the thought of his blanket - once again - having her scent made his eyes watery. Steve silently pulled Catherine into a tight hug, leaving a kiss on her hair, inhaling deeply her scent - the scent which served as a therapy for him.

"And there's one thing I need to tell you", Catherine took Steve's hand, waiting for him to fully turn to face her.

"Don't tell me you were rescued by a handsome prince charming. Should I be jealous?" He cracked a smile, clearly trying to lighten up the conversation.

"Very funny. Actually I was rescued by a fairy, if you say so. I don't know how, but Doris somehow appeared just in time, alone. Can you imagine she rescued me from 10 brutal Taliban soldiers? I couldn't believe how she could do all of that, but how she did it was flawless. I really underestimated her ability before, I've never thought... And I was wrong". Admiration and awe were filled in Catherine's eyes and voice. A flash of terror appeared in her eyes for a second, and she smoothly covered it by continuing her story, though it didn't go unnoticed by Steve.

"She risked everything to rescue me, which I am forever grateful. That woman is truly a legendary, Steve". Catherine wanted to let Steve know what Doris did for her. The only thing she didn't want to mention was also the sight she would never be able to forget for the rest of her life: the moment these Talibans took off her clothes and stripped her to the skin. In fact, she was almost raped, if Doris didn't come in time. Her hands and her legs were tightened. She was laying there on her belly on the ground, being exposed, stretched and more vulnerable than ever. She was too stubborn to obey them, of course, which forced them to literally use a horsewhip to "teach her how to behave". She lost counting of how many strokes her lower body received from those brutal Taliban. When one of those Taliban laid a hand on her body, she spat her saliva right in his face, which earned her several more strokes. That's exactly when Doris appeared in the front door.

That was also the reason why her body reacted in a negative way even to Steve's touch. She was obsessed with the whole touching part. She didn't realize it herself.

"Was she... okay? Was she... alive? Why didn't she even contact me? She went to Afghanistan to rescue you without letting me know? This woman's really off her rocker", Steve was actually ranting. He didn't want to admit, but obviously he couldn't hide a bunch of worry in his trembling voice.

"Of course she's fine. She took great care of me until...", she was about to say "until all of my swollen stripes were gone", but she changed her sentence "until she made sure that I was okay and was able to take care of myself."

"I guess I owe her a sincere Thank you. I did try to contact her, but she ducked my calls. I couldn't get a hold of her for the last whole year. I thought I lost her again. I didn't expect this... Why didn't she come back with you?"

"She told me that she has other important things to do. When I woke up that morning, she's already gone. I didn't have enough money. The rest is history."

"Important things huh? Yeah, everything else is more important than me. I guess she just doesn't want a son like me. Maybe I wasn't good enough to be her son... Maybe..." Steve let out a sigh. He hasn't talked about Doris for a very long time. Actually he couldn't remember when the last time he mentioned her in front of another person was. Having Catherine by his side made everything much easier for him. At least he wasn't alone.

"Steve, don't be ridiculous. Don't think like that. If it wasn't because of you, why did she have to risk her life to save me from the Taliban? She loves you, Steve, in her own way."

He closed his eyes for a moment, "I wish I could say Thank you to her, personally. I dread to admit I miss her sometimes. I don't know if I miss Doris, or just miss the memory I had with the mother I used to have, when I imagined myself as G. ", Steve cracked a soft smile while thinking about his childhood. When he was a kid, Doris was a truly wonderful dedicated mother. He always thought she was so "cool". He was so proud of her and boasted to every single friend of him about having the coolest and the most beautiful mommy in this whole world.

"She's still your mother. Always will be."

"Catherine... come back to sleep. You need to rest. Just remember, whenever you need to talk, I'm here", Steve didn't want to mention Doris. Not now. Not in front of Catherine. She had enough trouble to deal with. He didn't want to burden her with his own trouble.

"Yeah." Sensing Steve didn't want to continue the topic, Catherine backed off and respected his choice. He deserved some personal time. They both did.

"You too, lie down and sleep."

They lied silently so close next to each other, each pursuing their own train of thought - their own nightmare. Though their nightmares were not as scary as they used to be when they dealt with them alone.

"Steve, I can't sleep if you can't sleep", she moved closer to Steve, whispering into his ears.

"Yes, sorry. I just... I'll try", Steve smiled.

Another ten minutes passed by.

"Catherine..."

"Yeah?"

"I'm just so glad you're here. I lost everyone who was important in my life. My mom, Freddie, my dad. I kept telling myself I couldn't lose you too, yet I couldn't do a damn thing to bring you back. If it wasn't Doris... I don't...", he couldn't think clearly. He didn't even know what he was trying to say. His mind was full of complicated thoughts, and he just needed to get a part of it out of his system, "I'm such a good-for-nothing guy."

"No. Don't do that, Steve."

"I want to see her. I really want to, Catherine", Steve sounded like he was choking. His sentences were stuck somewhere in the back of his throat, though Catherine still heard what he was saying.

She snuggled up even closer to him, hugged him as tightly as possible. She hasn't done it for almost a year: being there for him when he needed her the most. Seeing him in such a devastating state made her own eyes water. She momentarily forgot her own fear and nightmare, just felt Steve's pain and helplessness. She hoped her presence could at least calm him down, even just a little bit.

Her arms were like a soft blanket, wrapping him, guiding him go into a safety zone. They kept that position for the whole night, just sought each other's closeness and enjoyed each other's company.

* * *

**5 AM**

The first morning she's home.

Steve stared at Catherine, taking in her breathtakingly beautiful face. His figure traced over her eyebrows, her nose, her closing eyes, her gorgeous lips, though he didn't really touch her because he didn't want to wake her up. He missed this feeling so badly: The first sight he could see after waking up was this sleeping beauty. Even after so many years, watching her sleep so peacefully still made his heart jump a bit faster. He would trade anything for this moment so that it could last a little longer.

"Good morning, Lieutenant". Oh, she didn't realize she missed this endearing voice so much until she actually heard this line again. She opened her eyes and realized she was being stared by her Commander. He looked so much relaxed than last night. She raised her hand and touched the bags under his eyes.

"You are not sleeping. What are you looking?", she smiled.

"The love of my life", Steve's reply even surprised himself. But he didn't regret saying such a big declaration. The words just came easily now that they had come so close to lose each other. Then he just wanted to make sure he lived in this moment, so he would have nothing to regret: "It feels unreal. I can't believe it's happening. It's so good to have you back."

"Did you even sleep?", she moved her hand, gently caressed Steve's left cheek.

"Not much."

"Steve..."

"Couldn't sleep. Had to make sure you're real is all. I'm glad you slept well last night..."

"I'm really here. Steve, sleep. Just for a while. Close your eyes."

"Promise me?"

"I promise I won't go anywhere. I'll be right here when you wake up. Now, sleep", she ordered him to close his eyes, then grinned as he obeyed instantly. Catherine closed the distance between them, carefully placed a soft kiss into his warm lips. He's right. It felt unreal. She had to make sure this isn't the same dream she had dreamt every night in the past year.

Steve murmured into her lips. "What are you doing?", He smiled without opening his eyes. Her kiss was so gentle and emotional. He enjoyed the feeling of it.

"Kissing the love of my life. Just want to make sure you're okay is all. Now sleep. You need to rest."

"Funny. We keep telling each other that."

"I rested. Now it's your turn."

"One more kiss, then I will."

"Unbelievable, Commander. How old are you? Twelve or something? she teased him, but she remembered the way he gently kissed her to sleep last night, without forcing her to make love with him... She could feel he was restraining himself from ripping her clothes off. That was the most touching thing ever from Steve, her Steve.

"Sleep well."


	3. Chapter 3

_Hello._

_It's been a while since the previous chapter. Every time I want to continue writing this story or want to post this chapter, I read a story of one of my favorite authors and I decide to drop my own story. I typed this chapter ages ago, but I wasn't confident enough to post it._

_Until today. _

_I wanna SCREAM 100 times: THANK YOU, PAULA. Thank you for spending time to revise my mess. Paula. I will never dare to post it without your help._

_Thanks for reading and hope you will enjoy the story! I'd really appreciate if you guys could take time leaving a comment._

_Disclaimer: All rights reserved for CBS and the managing team of Hawaii 5-0._

* * *

**Chapter 3:**

It had been several days since she came back to his world and they were still trying their best to find their way back together. Really back together.

They couldn't pretend nothing had changed over the past year. There was a void to be filled.

"Steve, we need to talk."

"That doesn't sound good", Steve thought to himself. Even though he was waiting for the moment when she'd be ready to talk; even though he was waiting for this opportunity for so long, when he actually heard her saying those words, he got worried. He didn't like the expression on her face. He could see that something was bothering Catherine. The serious tone of her voice evoked worry inside of Steve.

"What's wrong, Cath?", he took a step closer to Catherine, reaching out for her hand.

"You kept all of my clothes in your closet?" she raised her voice a bit, questioning him.

"Our closet", he changed the words, frowning because he didn't like her choice of words: "Yes I did. I figured you should... be happy. I guess." He knew where this conversation was going and clearly, he didn't like it.

"And that bowl in the kitchen where you keep plumerias in water. Some of them even wilted."

"Yeah. Are you mad at me because some flowers wilted?", he stared at her with eyes wide-opened as if he couldn't believe what he just heard.

"No, of course I'm not that ridiculous. It's not my point. It's just... weird", she hesitated, but continued: "You've never done that before. It just... wasn't your style."

"Yeah I don't know when it happened, but at some point it became a habit of mine to pick up flowers on my way home." The first time she came to Hawaii, he gave her one of these flowers and it became a thing for them ever since. Plumerias were always something that represented Hawaii, and they looked great on Catherine. Thinking about it made him grin every time. Deep down inside, he felt that Catherine belonged to this island as well, just like these beautiful, gorgeous, innocent flowers.

Seeing these flowers reminded him of the smile she wore every time he gave them to her. Her eyes sparkled whenever he appeared, flower in hand, whispering "Got that for you". That genuine smile and the sound of her laugh made his heart do a little bit flip-flop every time, even after all these years.

"It was a way to keep me focused. It didn't make me miss you any less, but somehow made me feel a bit better. What's so wrong with that?"

"Steve, I've been away for almost a year, and the possibility of me getting killed is pretty high, don't you think?", she knew how close she came to be raped and killed, and that fact scared her immensely. She did her best to control her trembling hands, but couldn't. She would never be able to totally forget the vision that came back to her in the form of nightmares almost every night. "It's not healthy to get stuck in the past, you know that, don't you? I just want to make sure if I had died, you know it would have been okay for you to have moved on with another girl. A girl who would continue to love and protect you. And you are going to accept that. You've been through so much, Steve, so much loss and pain. You deserve happiness. I wouldn't want you to stay single for the rest of your life. You would have had to to accept... something new. Letting someone into your life, letting someone else ease your pain. Living a life waiting for me... is definitely not what I wanted for you."

Realization hit him. Steve was paralyzed by her thoughts. He couldn't believe she actually said that out loud. Her words actually hit him like a splash of iced cold water and he felt like a stab directly to his heart - like someone was cruelly ripping his heart out of his body.

It took him a long moment to finally gather his thoughts and murmured: "When I was struggling because every person I knew told me to move on, your call saved my day because you said you didn't call to break up with me. I was happy on that day, Cath, it was the simplest and happiest moment I had to hold on to during this past year. You told me you'd be extremely careful to make it back to me, and you're here now. You didn't want me to move on back then, why do you want it now, Catherine? I don't get it."

"That was before when I was captured. I was so close to the death, and when I was in the Taliban's hands, I couldn't stop thinking about you. How would my death affect you? A life like this... you can't live like this, Steve..."

"Stop, Catherine."

"Steve, listen to me. You deserve happiness. If..."

He didn't let her finish her sentence. "So I get it. If I ever died, you'd be willing to move on, wouldn't you? Like the way you did with Billy? Very good. Excellent." Anger registered in his cracking voice. He flew off the handle and let some things slip out that he didn't really mean, and he regretted shortly after.

That was their first argument in many years. They weren't the type of couples that fought every day. Quite the contrary, they understood each other so well that they could complete each other's sentences or guess each other's thoughts even when they wanted to keep them to themselves.

"Yes". That wasn't exactly what she had in mind, but she let it slip, "if you wanted me to. Because that's exactly the reason why you broke up with me in the past."

"Catherine, don't do this to me now," his voice was pleading. "Loving you makes me happy, missing you makes me happy, I don't need any other kind of happiness", his eyes were shimmering with tears.

Steve rubbed his couldn't stare at her anymore, so he opened the door, stepped outside and sat down heavily on the lanai. He wanted to go somewhere, maybe go out for some beers, but he didn't want to leave her home alone. He needed something to do, like running or swimming, to cool him down, because his head was full of anger, bitterness and hurt. He couldn't calm down. His hands wouldn't stop shaking.

Everything she said in there... hurt him more than anything he had endured. He had this nightmare before, where she told him to move on over the phone, which kept him awake. He stayed up all night that night, trying to get rid of that vivid gruesome nightmare.

And now... it really happened to him. Even when at least he was prepared for that, he couldn't handle the pain that was affecting every cell in his body. It pierced through him with an unbearable force. At some points he thought he couldn't breathe properly.

He totally forgot about his wounded arms. But he didn't even feel anything, except for the pain in his heart. None of this pain could compare to the pain of what Catherine just said several minutes ago.

He finally noticed a bottle of wine left outside the lanai. Chin brought him a bottle of whiskey the other day, when he came over to apologize for implying it's time for him to move forward. As he told Catherine, every person he knew in his life gave him the same "advice", and it killed him to hear it. He and Catherine have had this "thing" for a decade, she was his best friend. How could everyone possibly expect him to move on from something like that, just because nearly a year had passed? Steve would never understand.

Hearing it from Catherine was like the very last straw. The pain was so strong that there was no way he could suppress it – even his SEAL techniques couldn't keep emotions at bay. He wanted to cry, to burst into crying, yet he didn't know how to.

Steve looked at the bottle of wine for a moment, then finally grabbed it and poured himself a glass. They never had the chance to finish that bottle because there was a duty call that night, right after they were done with the previous case ended that afternoon. And Steve was more than willing to throw himself into work, to prevent himself from missing "someone" so badly. He hated being at home alone.

He took a large swallow from his glass, but the pain wouldn't just go away. He gritted his teeth and drank some more. Tears finally were formed in his eyes, so he looked up to watch the dark sky above. When the glass was empty, he continued drinking straight from the bottle. Darkness grew around him. Loneliness was the only word he could think of. He hadn't felt this way before, especially when Catherine was in his house, when he literally sensed her presence. But today...

She, of all people, should have understood why he couldn't move on...

He stood up, moving closer to the beach. It was so beautiful tonight, though he was sure it was not nearly as beautiful as the beauty who was sitting inside his house right now. He wanted to go inside, yet knowing how stubborn Catherine was, he knew she was not going to let it slide.

He came back to the house after hours of swimming, but he sat on the lanai before confronting her again. Truthfully, fighting with Catherine was the last thing Steve wanted to do.

But after all, losing a fight is much better than losing her. There's no pain in this world that could compare to losing her. He came so close to that, he didn't want to experience that feeling ever again.

Steve took his phone out of his pocket and looked at the locked screen. He was never the type of man who had his girlfriend's picture as the wallpaper, but he did it anyway, since the first night Catherine was in Afganishtan. It made him feel closer to her. It somehow made him feel better and safer, even he knew it's just a picture.

It was a picture taken on the day that Catherine retired from the Navy. He was so proud of her. He has always been proud of her. She looked fabulous and incredibly beautiful in her white dress. He had always admired her in uniform, not because of her beauty, but because of her confidence, commitment and strength. In his eyes, she looked gorgeous even in her cargo pants. Realization hit him. It would be the very last time he could see her in her Navy uniforms. He wondered how this decision would affect their lives.

The day was full of laughter and happiness. Max took a picture of them standing together after the ceremony. He asked if Catherine liked the Chicago album, even teased her that she had the biggest fanboy ever, pointing at the grinning Steve. He even told Catherine about the little conversation in HQ with Steve, which earned Steve a hard smack in his arm from Catherine because he threated to use gun on Max.

Steve knew he was grinning like an idiot, but he couldn't hide his pride and excitement for her. Just thinking about that time was enough to bring a smile into his face now.

She was so beautiful. His fingers gently caressed her beautiful face on his screen. How could she expect him to move on, after everything they've been through?

It was almost 9pm.

Suddenly, Steve realized they hadn't eaten dinner. He wasn't hungry but he couldn't stand the thought of Catherine being hungry. Being a Taurus, she always loved food. Over the years, he knew her so well, that's why he usually used "dinner" as an excuse to invite her out, instead of going to some pubs or coffee shops. He told Danny once, that every relationship started with a coffee, but that didn't work in his and Catherine's relationship.

He never believed in Horoscope before, but being so devastated, he searched her sign and was surprised to discover that fact about the Taurus sign.

Steve stood up, swiftly went back to the house.

He saw Catherine silently sitting on their sofa, with her knees curled up and her face buried in her knees. Steve didn't like using the word "vulnerable" to describe Catherine, but that word best described the sight in front of him right now.

Sensing his presence, Catherine looked up, looking at Steve but didn't say anything. Neither did he. They were both to stubborn to give in and admit they were wrong first, especially when each had good reasons for feeling the way they felt. They could read the sadness in each other's eyes, which clenched at their hearts even more.

Steve went straight to the kitchen and made a quick, simple dish as quickly as possible and walked back to the living room. In his hands was a tray with two plates of toasted omelette sandwiches and some tea. As he set the tray down, he saw the first-aide kit that hadn't been there before, was now placed in front of her.

He didn't realize until now, but damn, his arm hurt so much.

"Eat", his voice came our a little bit more harshly than he intended. Seeing her reminded him of their argument earlier. He tried to forget all about that, tried to let it go, tried to pretend she hadn't said anything to him, but he couldn't.

"I'm not hungry."

"You should eat", he tried lowering his voice.

"Your arm... Steve... it's bleeding."

"I don't care. Just shut up and eat, okay?"

Catherine stared at him. She could hear the anger, tiredness and helplessness that registered in his voice. It hurt her so much telling Steve that he should have moved on, but she just couldn't stand the thought of him being alone, waking up from his nightmares alone. She knew he was still mad at her. He rarely raised his voice when talking to her, and he certainly never told her to "Shut up". Even when he was completely pissed off at her when she didn't tell him about the incident between Doris and Mangosta, he kept an even tone and simply asked her to leave instead of telling her to shut up.

"I'm sorry."

When Catherine was about to say sorry, a gentle voice spoke into her ear. It was coming from Steve.

"What are you sorry for, exactly?"

"For saying Shut up. I shouldn't say that. I'm sorry for... everything. If me saying sorry makes you feel better, then I am sorry. I feel bad I said that. I didn't mean it. I just... It hurts...", he was struggling, trying to express himself: "Doesn't matter. Catherine, you shouldn't skip dinner. You're home. You have food. We have food. I'm not going to let you be hungry."

"I'm not that hungry. You really think I can eat after we... like this?", she used her finger to indicate the situation between them.

"I'm sorry."

"I don't want you to say it. I just want to know if you could understand my point earlier."

"I do not. I do think I have the right to be angry over what you said earlier. But I feel bad about what I said about Billy. I was the one who told him that he should go to you... because I was scared I couldn't make it back to you after that mission. I was scared, Catherine. The thought of not coming back to you scared the shit out of me, I was wrong to tell him to..."

She didn't let him finish, "Okay, so let me get this straight. It's okay for you to suggest Billy get with me, but it's wrong if I want you to move on? You're seriously mad at me because I told you that you shouldn't miss me that much?"

"Just... I don't want us to be like this. And it's freaking different, Catherine. We were so young back then. We agreed not to have any commitment in our relationship, and I tried to abide by that. But it's absolutely not fair if you expect me to move on now, after our 15-year-old thing. And after just one year. How can I move on after one freaking year? What kind of boyfriend I am if I move on from you just after a year huh, Catherine? I can't even think about it. It's just not that easy. I got that same "advice" from a lot of people. But hearing it from you... it's unbearable. I've endured torture before, but none of them was as nearly painful as hearing you telling me to move on from you. I just... can't take it, Catherine."

"You do have a point there, but... I don't want you to live a life like the one you lived for the past year... What if...?", that image kept coming back and haunting her. She couldn't help trembling.

"There's no "What if", you're here now. You're home. Our home. Besides, that's what I chose, and I don't regret it. I know it's ridiculous, but I once asked you: "_Did you ever think that maybe, just maybe, I can't... live without you_?", right?". He had no idea why he let that out during a phone call, he just... did. It's more like he was asking himself. "I know you thought that was a flirt, a joke, but it wasn't. I've really thought about it a lot over the years. A lot. And when I said it, I meant it. It's been one year, and thanks to that, I realize that I can. I _can_ live without you. But I just don't want to. It's just a lonely and meaningless life. I woke up every day from that nightmare – if I could actually sleep, a nightmare where you leave me forever, where I have no one caring about me, loving me. A nightmare where there's no one like you beside me, who can protect me like the way you protect me. Truth is, I want to wake up with no one but you beside me. I want the first thing I see after waking up every morning is the sight of you sleeping next to me. I want us to protect and love each other. Without you, I only exist. Existing and being alive and happy are two very different things, you know...". Thinking back about that 12-month-period really sent a shiver down Steve's spine. He was broken. She wasn't there for him, holding him, whispering into his ear that he's gonna be okay, that no one will be able to hurt him - because she's there. No one.

Catherine was in shock. She couldn't recall the last time Steve gave such a lengthy, heartfelt speech. Steve had never been good at expressing himself in words. Hearing what's on his mind, she felt more in love with him even more than ever.

"Now, can I change your bandage?"

"No, you eat first. This is no big deal. I'm a SEAL, remember. It doesn't hurt. I'll be okay, as long as you eat". Catherine didn't realize she was crying until Steve let his hand touch her cheek, wiping away the tears that were streaming down her face.

"It's bleeding, Steve. Can you... please... just let me do it? Let me take care of you."

Steve was about to protest, but the worry written in her eyes made him immediately shut his mouth. He knew Catherine just wanted to take care of him, like when she was injured on the night Billy died, there's nothing he wanted to do more than make her to stay in bed and sleep so that he could care for her. Steve silently obeyed her order, sitting there and letting her change his bandage. He looked at her so attentively, quietly let out a "Thank you!".

"I guess you should add this task into the official job description of "Assistant to Commander McGarrett"", she smiled, trying to change his bandage as gently as possible. It felt like ages since the last time she did it. To be honest, she had never had a chance to really take care of him when he got injured. That was something she's always regretted.

She wasn't there in he needed her the most. That fact hurt her more than anything else.

He was there for her when she was kidnapped, almost gave up his career for her. He was there for her when she retired from the Navy, helping her cope with the whole situation, preparing for a new chapter of her life, being super supportive. He was there for her when Billy died. He was there for her when she almost sacrificed herself for a humanitarian act, almost gave up his own life for her.

What did she do for him? What could she do for him? When was she there for him? Other than the phone calls over the years. She wasn't there physically for him, when he lost Freddie, when he lost his father, when he was tortured in North Korea, when he was captured and tortured by the Taliban, when he was tortured by Wo Fat. The thought that she didn't bring anything but pain to him killed her. She tried so hard not to burst into tears. How could he still love her after all that?

"Don't. Stop this train of thought. For my sake. For me. My life would be completely destroyed and miserable without you. You're in here. All the time. That was what kept me going over the years. You're here, you should know that", his uninjured hand hold her trembling hand, guiding her hand to rest over his heart.

"How...?", she should've known. He knew her better than she knew herself. She whispered "Thank you" before reaching up, kissing his chin.

He smiled contentedly, trying to lighten their conversation: "Also, Lieutenant Catherine Rollins, you know the turnover rate of this special job – "Assistant to Steve McGarrett" - is really low right? Once you say "Yes" to this job, it's not easy to give it up. There's no way to back down. You're not getting rid of me that easy. You know that?"

"I know."

"Good". It sounded like a promise to him. All the pain he had to endure seemed to be over off with her simple reply. He couldn't help being happy. "I know" – That sounds like the best sound in his world.

"You made me promise to be careful. Why can't you be careful, huh?", she adjusted her position, sat back next to him on the couch, carefully hugging his arm, letting her head rest on his shoulder.

"It's not my fault. I was careful."

"Chin told me you just... stood there and... got distracted... because the suspect's name was Catherine."

"That's not true."

"Is it?"

"I'm gonna kill Chin for telling you that."

Catherine poked his injured arm, causing a groan from Steve. "Ouch. What's that for?"

"Don't ever do that again. You should be concentrate on your job under all circumstances, all right?"

"Aye, Ma'am. I'm so glad neither Chin nor you were my CO. Otherwise, I couldn't get away from a punishment. And you... are so cruel. I am the patient here, can you just pretend to be gentle for a minute?", he pouted, holding his injured arm, yet still teasing her.

"You know what, sometimes I think it would be much better if you had someone not as stubborn as me in your life... Who will listen to what you say and just do it..."

"No, Catherine...", Steve raised his voice a bit louder than he intended to, "I'm begging you. Don't talk about it anymore. Let it go, for now, okay? You're here and we are good. That's all that matters. I don't want to think about anything other than that. Can you focus on taking care of my arm instead of ripping my heart out, please?"

She just looked at his wound, caressing it. She smiled for herself at the thought of her wish when she was injured for the first time after staying in Afghanistan. She wished he could kiss it better, but he wasn't there. Now, she's here when he's injured, at least she could do something to make him feel better, hopefully, so she bent down and gently kissed his wound.

"Cath?", he asked her, almost begging her, "okay?"

Catherine looked up to him, smiled at him and gradually nodded, then silently pulled him in for a kiss as her "peace offering". His body gradually became less strained, he seemed to be relaxed immediately after the kiss. Their intimacy always made them feel better. That has never changed.

"That's my girl", Steve beamed after they parted their lips. He looked so content. This goofy smile was something she fell for more than a decade ago, and somehow, after so many years, it still made her skip a heartbeat.

"What do you mean?"

"I admit: I did kiss several girls last year. That wasn't my intention. I don't know how Danny did it, but he convinced Governor to order me to take part in one of his balls, where I had to play the Prince Charming to raise the fund for the charity. That was fucking stupid. My job was staying there like an idiot, waiting to kiss the girls who donated the greatest amount of money", Steve grimaced at the thought of it. "Three or four girls, maybe. The only thing I could remember was I had no feelings during those kisses. Remind me, you always told me that I'm an attentive kisser, a better kisser than Billy, I believe", he boasted and grinned, "But that night I wasn't. It just didn't feel right when none of them put their hands in my face while kissing, like the way you always do". That gesture of her has always driven him crazy. He has been on the receiving end of that gesture for so many years, actually, for almost a half of his life. That has become a part of him. Her hand on his face made him feel so special, so precious, as if that's her way of protecting him. "Whenever someone told me to give it a try, the thought of having to kiss another girl stopped me dead in my tracks. I can't imagine... Just thinking about it gives me a shiver. Literally", he showed her his arm, as if she could actually see the goose bumps there.

"I didn't even realize I had that habit. I guess it just comes naturally", she kissed him one more time and was really surprised when she realized her hand was caressing his cheek. Steve leant into her palms to enjoy the moment. After a while, he pulled her hand back and placed his lips into her warm palms. He's missed doing that. She wasn't his first kiss, but she's the kiss that mattered. She was the reason he didn't want to kiss anyone else.

"To them, it's just a kiss, but to me, it's a big deal. It just didn't feel right. I felt like I betrayed the only woman I love. I realized how much I missed you. Several days after that, you actually called me, for the first time in three months, the night I was drunk. That was the moment I realized no matter what would happen, I would wait for you, no matter how long it would be."

"Aww, Steve", Catherine decided to lean in and kiss him as a reward – to both of them. He could feel her hug become a little tighter. It actually hurt his injured arm, but he didn't give a damn. This – having her back, physically and totally emotionally, was the best thing in his miserable life.

"I didn't talk to Danny for the next two days. I was so mad at him. That's why it took me so long to finally pick up your first call. I thought that was him", he sounded sheepishly.

"How childish of you!"

"It's your fault, so it's time to make it up for me!"

"Wow. You're even more childish right now. Who are you and what have you done with my Commander? I miss him."

"Everything in this house is almost the same, except me. I've changed, Cath. Can you accept this version of me?". His voice suddenly became serious.

"First off, Princess. Second, a legendary story about Valentine's Day of a foreign country. Collecting the plumerias everyday... Now this. You've really changed. But I like it. I miss the old you and I really like this new side of you."

"That's good. That's good.", Steve pulled her closer and leant over for another kiss.

"Now, can you eat, please?"

"Only if you eat with me."

"Yeah. By the way, got that for you." – He presented a beautiful white flower in front of her.

"Impressive. We fought over this flower, I was mad at you because of this flower, you didn't talk to me for 4 hours because of this flower, and now you gave me this? Seriously?"

"I know you love them anyway."

"You're such a softie. Remember the first time we fought?"

"Never forget. I was such a dumb."

"Yes you were."

Their first fighting was something both of them would never forgot. Sometimes they sat together teasing each other about that time.

"12 messages saying "Sorry" in a row. Just one word and nothing else."

"Come on. Just wanna make my point crystal clear. That was the first time in my life I didn't have a specific tactic to achieve something. You were hurt, and I was so lost. I didn't know what else to say. If I went back in time, I would still choose to do the same."

"You're so dumb. My dumb Commander."

She kissed him with her hand touching his face so gently, and he was more than willing to deepen the kiss.


End file.
